bummed days

It's on days like this that I feel the stillness: that I'm here and how everything else is at a distance. But I don't blame it all on the weather, just most of it.

It's been like this for a couple of days now and believe me, I haven't done anything productive since it started. At first it was okay, then I got restless and eventually I'm so bummed out. 3 days and I hope I don't have to count anymore.

I keep on putting in off on the weather until I realized that the real reason for all these is that I'm just lonely. Well, maybe a little left out. Seeing people advance forward, and me just staying in place can be a bit scary. It leaves you a question which might go like: "where am I supposed to go now?". But then I know where I'm going, I know what I want and that maybe the better question is, "how am I gonna start?" Then, you don't know the answer. And that's how it became scary.

Now, I can't wait for the sun to shine again. But even if it won't, I will. :)